What is love?

How the fuck should I know?

I haven't even been in a relationship before, much less love someone (other than my relatives), so how can I even say that I am in love with someone?

That's why I am here to clear things up to STOP YOU GUYS from pestering me to reveal who HE is.

Because he is NO ONE but a friend.

Who I thought I was in love with, but now I realised I've been really wrong.

Okay, so I might get butterflies when his name is mentioned, when I happen to think of him, and especially so when I see him.

But does that mean I love him?

No, I think I just get butterflies everytime his name is mentioned because I'm afraid that he might happen to be around, and then in some weird ways find out that I have written about how much I like him in my blog.

It's crazy, this, and I don't really know how to explain it.

All this time that I say my heart beats like crazy when I see him, I thought it was because I love him.

But now I've come to realise that it's probably just because I'm scared he'd find out that I am somehow attracted to him, and it would be mighty embarrassing for me.

Because do I dream of him everynight?

No.

Do I think of him all the time?

No.

Okay, fine. Not really.

But still.

Do I imagine to live with him for the rest of my life?

Absolutely NO!

So you see, I'm probably just interested in him for a fling. A short experience. A curious experiment.

That's all.

All those shit about heartbeat racing and being in live and besotted, WRONG. DOESN'T EXIST.

Not wishful thinking either.

Okay probably, a little bit.

But still. I can state with certainty right now that I am NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM ANYMORE.

Or ever had been. I was just attracted to him (BIG DIFFERENCE).

So stop pestering me about questions involving him okay? Because I have NO FUCKING CLUE.

Why stay in contact with someone who DOESN'T EVEN WANT TO REPLY YOUR TEXT? Who doesn't even have the slightest desire to continue the friendship?

I'm over this.

Sick of it.

Chuz.

And one more time: STOP ASKING ME ABOUT HIM. PLEASE.