Sheeeesh

God, is everyone on a strike against me?

Just because I missed school two days in a row???

Hey, I skipped school. SO WHAT?

Is that reason enough to ignore my texts and calls?

Especially right now, at this totally low point of my life???

Hello, but harsh.

I have my reasons okay?

Fine. You wanna play the Cold War game?

I'm on it.

Ciao.

Teenagers!

It is 1.55am right now and I have school tomorrow. Which starts at 7.00am. Which means I will have to wake up at promptly 6.00am tomorrow, I mean afterwards. Which I won't. Because thank Sony Ericsson for creating phones with alarms that snooze for 9 minutes. So I will without fail hit snooze twice and end up waking up at 6.18am. And then I will go brush my teeth all the while having to ignore mean glares from my sister because I am once again late. But I don't care. I do that every morning. Haha.

God, sometimes I feel that I am so lifeless. There is no fun stuff in my life. Even if there is fun stuff in my life, the not fun stuff will cover up my fun stuff. You see, all of my friends are very good kids who abide by their parents' rules. I mean, I do listen to my parents, but sometimes if they are being unreasonable, I really cannot tolerate!

No, what I'm trying to say about my friends is, they don't go out often enough. I want to go shopping SO BAD and I want to go out for mamaking DESPERATELY. I just want to hang out with my friends, that's all! But my friends aren't those kind of girls. When they go shopping, they aren't allowed to buy anything, and they don't bring alot of money because their mums tell them not to. Shit, kan? It is not fun to go shopping if you are the only one buying stuff. If that's it, I'd rather go shopping on my own. Not so frustrating.

And then mamaking? Whoever heard of people going to mamaks but have a curfew of 10.00pm? Is that even mamaking? That is not mamaking. There should NOT be a curfew for mamaking. Mamaking means talking and crapping and catching up and then leave ONLY when everyone feels like it's time to leave. That's mamaking. I mean, come one. You guys finish tuition sometimes even at 10.30pm! Is 10.00pm really too late???

I mean, I would understand if my friends were like, 12 years old, but we're freaking 16 okay! We are even legally allowed to have sex! (Age consent to have sex legally in M'sia is 16, though weird cos some movies are rated 18-sx) So what is the problem??? Mums! You guys gotta wake up, man. I mean, I know you are worried about having your kids exposed to all kinds of danger and wild friends and stuff, but hello, don't you know that the people your kids hang out with are usually first class students who score well for exams and therefore know how to differentiate between what's to do and what's not because GOD knows how many Moral classes we have been to already?

Sheeesh. We are matured enough to take care of ourselves, thanks. So, mums, can you please offer us some liberty and freedom in doing stuff that we like to do? We are teenagers, okay? When are we going to have fun if we don't do it now?? We're in high school! This is supposed to be the most memorable time of our lives, we don't want it to only be about the Quadratic formula, Nabi s.a.w's birthdate and 10.00pm curfew mamaks! We want it to be about really fun and awesome stuff like Bungee-jumping and/or pool parties!

THANK GOD my mum is lesser of a control freak than most of my friend's mums. No offence Aunties. But really, I think my mum started to understand that it's kind of okay to let your kids have fun after my sister graduated from school and started seeing people. I don't know. One day my mum even asked, not scolded, she actually asked, if I had a boyfriend. And oh my God you know what's weirder? She actually told me to bring the guy home for family bonding before I get so close with him! Haha. I was like, "Erm. What?" Because I was so surprised! I never thought my mum of all people would be okay with me having a boyfriend while still in high school. Haha.

And I didn't even remind her that I was in an all-girls school and don't go to tuition (hence my zero social life) as I would usually do, because I was toooooo surprised! Haha.

But I'm not sure she did the right thing though. Cos if anything, having been granted such freedom, I've kind of turned out to be a little bit wilder than I ever was before. Haha. I mean, I'm not doing anything bad, but I sure am more of a social person now. Haha. I mean, I now look forward to meeting new people, especially guys, and I'm no longer shy to talk to them (as if I have ever been. Most times I'm just too busy checking the guy out to start talking to him. And I think most people dismisses this as shyness. Haha.) and I look forward to going out with them! Which I am now allowed to do without having to listen beforehand to an essay-long lecture from my mum about the dirtiness of a boy's mind! (sorry, don't mean to be sexist! Haha.)

So, it's the new, more grown up me. :D And I guess that explains why I'm so vain nowadays.

Haha. Maybe I'm waiting for my Prince Charming in shining armour. Or my Romeo in black skinny jeans. Whichever who's hotter. Haha. :D

Hey, but my mum said I could see guys right? :D :D :D

Ciao.

No wait, last words, I wish Hou Hou, Armie and Hanz the best of luck for their SPM and lots of love to you guys, if it helps with the nerves! :)

So, ciao!

jjjj

Pra-BAKP or Genting?

Okay, so because of recent events, I have been dubbed 'emo' by Audrey. I'm sorry. Things aren't good these days. But no worries! I am a happy person! :) I am not emo! And I don't want to be. And I don't like to be! :D

So, besides defending the happy side of me, this post is also a continuation of the previous post, about my Genting trip clashing with the stupid Pra-BAKP.

Okay, for those wondering what Pra-BAKP is, it is actually this pre-camp for the QGCs (Queen's Guide candidates) who are taking this really important and required test which is called the BAKP. BAKP is basically a camp, where the QGCs will have to plan and organise activities. We have to run the camp, make sure everything goes right and stuff. It's part of Queen's Guide. :)

So this Pra-BAKP, it's really important that we attend it, because we will have to sit down and have a meeting with the other QGCs from other schools. We need to decide on the best activities and about food stuff and everything. At first, Pra-BAKP was supposed to be going on from 8 to 9 November 2008. And our Genting trip is from the 12 to 14 November 2008.

But all of a sudden, amidst our happy plannings and blissful fantasies of what fun it would be to hang around Genting, someone called to inform that this stupid Pra-BAKP had been postponed from to the 14 to 15 November 2008! And it clashes our Genting trip.

So I was like, "Bye bye, Genting fun. Hello stress."

I mean, how unfair is that? All our plans just go 'boom!' and goes down the drain.

BUT, I am WAY past that phase of total depression and dismal over this, so I'll just accept the fact that we will have to cut the Genting trip short and only stay one night.

I guess in life, we have to give and take. And to achieve something, there are sacrifices that have to be made. And this, I guess, is one of them.

So I really hope that I, no, WE, will turn out to be really good and successful Queen's Guides because, if we don't, then our sacrifice this time will be nothing but a big, sucky, disgusting Waste with a capital 'W'.

And of course, being the best Queen's Guides we can be will make Puan Ding very, very proud, so I guess, it will be worth it. :)

Ciao.

EDITED

This post has caused alot of hurt to various parties. Which I think was very wrong of me to even post this in the first place. But to my plight, I never thought this could hurt anyone. Honest.

Anyhow, I believe this post has served it's purpose already. We'll move on from this. Amen.

OH MY GOD

Pra-BAKP has been postponed from 8-9 November 2008 to 14-15 November 2008.

And it clashes with our Genting trip.

IN TOO MUCH SHOCK TO TALK ABOUT IT.

More later.

Ciao.

So Much For My Happy Ending

Sometimes I really wonder if it's really that fucking hard to get things done. I mean, I am struggling right now. I am almost dying. And the funny part, I am not talking about my quest to be a Queen's Guide. I am talking about my personal pursuit in having a half-way decent trip out with my mates.

We have been planning this Genting outing for like AGES now. And then when my fucking hypocritical, self-centered, bitching (note that I didn't say bitchy, cos she isn't bitchy, she just bitches alot), irritating, arrogant, embarrassing blood-related sister said she was going to Genting with her stupid boyfriend (okay, her boyfriend is NOT stupid, just that his wanting to be with my stupid sister makes me SAY that he is, of course I know he isn't. Whatever.) And so I thought maybe I could rope a hope on having him book a room for me. Cos he's the only human I know right now who owns a credit card. And since he was gonna book a room already, I could just ask him to click a few more little buttons and then I could have my rooms as well.

So is that really asking much? Am I too much? Was I asking him to loan me a million dollars? Was I asking him to give me half his liver? I wasn't. I only requested that he clicked a few more buttons. What is so wrong with that??? And he wasn't even the one bitching about how I was being a little overboard with my requests. No, not the one who owns the credit card. But, yea, you guessed it. My stupid sister.

So, I went like this, "Erm, can I please have Tommy (the BF) book a room for me on the same date that you are going to Genting? Cos me and my friends wanna go too. :)"

And then she was like, "Please confirm with your friends first. I will only book the room once I have the actual amount of money paid to me in cash."

I was like, "God, it's credit card isn't it? Why do you need the money so bad? I will try to get, okay? But no promises."

And then she went on about some lies that the credit card's due date was this and that. She told me to go right away and ask my friends for the money, only then she will book the rooms.

I was already very pissed at that moment. But I accepted that the due date was then and I knew that it wasn't nice to be owing that much money from someone I barely even knew (huh, so much for a closer bond, huh?). So I ripped off my prideful mask and went to school and asked everyone who was going to Genting for the money. I went through Hell, okay?

Some of my friends said, "Wow, you are collecting the money so early? The trip’s not in three weeks!" I felt like shit at that time and but then I just smiled. Cos I really thought that the due date thing was true. So I respected that.

So I got about RM200 in ONE DAY, which was alot if you ask me and then when I got home my fucking sister was like, "Where's the money?" I wanted to slap her at that time.

So I just went, "So you really need the money so bad? Does he really need the money so bad? I haven't finished collecting."

And then she went, like she was so smart or something, "I told you. I told you your friends would be like that. That is why I wanted to collect the money first. I don't want anyone backing out in the end and causing a lot of trouble cancelling the rooms. And I knew you would be like that. You would just get the rooms, and then you wouldn't care about anything anymore. I just knew it."

And then I exploded. I really hated her. I wanted to strangle her, I tell you. I went, "Hello. Do you think I am stupid or sommat? I already told them that if they wanted to back out they still needed to pay the money and they said fair. And don't assume that I didn't do anything as if you're so smart. You didn't see the hell that I went through!"

Does she expect me to ask for the money every time I see my friends? Is that what she wants me to do? Does she want my friends to portray me as a money-faced asshole? I DID tell them about the credit card not being mine and it wasn't nice to keep the cash from the owner. But it is NOT my fault that they still don't come and give me the money right?

Can you imagine how humiliating it is to go up to your friends and they are like, "Hey Jo-Yee." And then I go on and, "Oh, hi. Can I have the thirty bucks now?"

I know I did say that I would fork out my own bucks if the amount of money my friends paid was still insufficient. But YOU said RM200 was enough already right??? You said OKAY. So what are you saying right now?????

I am not that type of person to ask for money all the time, okay. I managed to get RM200 for the RM300++ debt, okay? Isn't that good enough? And she has to go up and down acting like she's queen and patronising me about my way with friends. Hello. I am the one with a million friends, okay? Unlike you, the pathetic one whose best friend doesn't even text to anymore. And I don't even blame her. If I had a friend like you, so two-faced and selfish, I would pack my bags and stay away as far as was humanly possible from you. I am sorry but you just make me sick.

And the part that totally kills me? The way she gets into an argument and then storms off without hearing the opposite's reply. And that is not even because what she says is true, but because she is cowardly and fears that the opposite would outtalk her. Come on. She is SO transparent AND she thinks she is really good at hiding. Fuck you.

I did tell my friends to bring the money today, okay? It is NOT my fault that they forget, or refuse to pay and just because you didn't SEE me reminding them, DOESN'T MEAN I didn't! I did. Don't assume things, bitch. You are not psychic. AND you are NOT smart. SO be it. And that is not even your money. It's Tommy's.

Turned out that the due date thing was a lie after all. And I believed her. God. She's such a fucking liar. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER????? WHY does she have to ruin my one chance of having fun with my friends??? WHY??? My asking Tommy to loan me the use of his credit card DOES NOT affect HER FUCKING LIFE a SINGLE BIT. SO what is she doing all this for??? Whatever the fuck have I done in my life that is so unforgivable that you have to do this to me???

And so, I took matters into my own hands, I called Tommy. I told him about my difficulties in asking my friends to fish out the money and could he just give me one more week, and he just, "Oh, sure, okay." in this really nice manner. And I was like, okay, SO WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT????? Cos before this, in utter disbelief that my stupid sister would want to ruin my life like this, I initially figured that maybe it was Tommy who was rushing for me to pay the money.

But now the truth is unveiled. Tommy doesn't mind a single BIT!!! It was my stupid sister all along playing her stupid game. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER?????

I just don’t know what she's doing all this for. Does she really need the money so urgently??? Or does she need the money for treatment for this terminal disease she is secretly diagnosed with??? Like AIDS!!! Or cancer!!! Because if that is true, I would say Amen. Do mankind a favour and be gone. And the world will become such a better place, bless. Good riddance and rest in peace, thanks.

Okay I didn't mean that. But I am still really pissed. I don't know what she's trying to play. God, I just hope that my friends would hurry up and pay the money already so I wouldn't need to be weighed down by this stupid exhausting problem.

I wish I could hug Cherrie now and tell her everything. :(

Ciao.

Tagged! :D

1. The person who tag/pass you is?

Trish.

2. Your relationship with her/him is?

Good friends. I think. I hope. :D :D :D

3. Your five impression of her/him?

- Cute

- Adorable

- Funny

- Totally creative!

- But blur. Haha.

4. The most memorable thing she/he had done for you?

Erm. Making me laugh most of the time when she’s around me.

5. The most memorable thing she/he had said to you?
Erm. I don’t know. Maybe, thank you? Haha.

6. If she/he become your lover you will?

Laugh until my skin tear off because that is so not going to happen. Because 1. I don’t look anything like David Cook. 2. I’m pretty sure she’s straight. 3. I’m pretty sure I’m straight. 4. Are you totally kidding me???

7. If she/he become your lover, thing she/he has to improve on will be?

Erm. I love her to bits but it’s never gonna happen. Period.

8. If she/he become your enemy, you will?

Cry in disbelief because she’s just too nice to be anyone’s enemy.

9. If she/he become your enemy, the reason will be?

Haha. She murdered Cherrie. Hahahaha.

10. The most desired thing you want to do for her/him now is?

Make her happy. :D

11. Your overall impression of her/him is?

Awesome girl.

12. How you think people around you will feel about you?

Erm… Entertained? Hahahaha. :D :D :D

13. The characters you love of yourself are?

Erm. The fact that I understand a lot of things and I care a lot about the world and those who live in it.

14. On the contrary, the character you hate yourself are?

My procrastinating habit. So what’s new?

15. The most ideal person you want to be is?

A successful me.

16. For people that care and like you, say something to them.

I love and care about you guys too! Muaxxxx! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ :D :D :D

17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wished to know how they feel about you.

1) Cherrie

2) Ashley

3) Mae Vin

4) Trish

5) Rock Chan

6) Audrey

7) Hou Hou

8) April

9) Sue May

10) Miss-Hanz

18. Who is no.6 having relationship with?

What kind of relationship? :D :D :D

19. Is no.9 is a male or female?

Female. High School Musical. Hahahahaha.

20. If number 7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?

Hahaha. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for them to have kids considering, you know, they are BLOOD-RELATED. Haha.

21. What is no.2 studying about?

Pure Science in Form 4. She can do really well, you know, if only she would WAKE UP.

22. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?

Just yesterday. We went to the museum togevah! :D :D :D

23. What kind of music band does no. 8 like?

Er. I dunno. Blue???

24. Does no.1 have any siblings?

Yups. Two brothers.

25. Will you woo no.3?

If I were LW, yes. Hahahahaha.

26. How about number 7?

Ooooooo. If he wasn’t related to me, maybe. Hahahahaha. but seriously, I don't woo people. I'm a girl, thanks.

27. Is no. 4 single?

I dunno. I guess. Trish, are you single??? :D :D :D

28. What is the surname of no.5?

Lee. 李. :D

29. What’s the hobby of no.10?

Erm. Blogging and writing music I guess?

30. Does no.5 and 9 get along well?

Sure! Good friends they are! :D

31. Where is no.2 studying at?

S.M.K. (P) Bukit Kuda, Jalan Perak, 41300, Klang, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia, South East Asia, Asia, World, Earth, Milky Way, Universe.

32. Talk something casually about no.1?

Love her loads. :)

33. Have you tried developing feelings for no.6?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Sorry, but we're related, thanks. :)

34. Where does no.9 live at?

Somewhere in Kampung Jawa I think. :D

35. What colour does no.4 like?

Black! And white and brown! (Read enough bulletin posts and surveys to know this. :D)

36. Are no.5 and 1 best friends?

Haha. Friends, I guess, but not best friends.

37. Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world?

Haha. Erm. Not unsexy but not the sexiest in the world. NO OFFENCE. Hahahaha. :D :D :D

38. What is no.6 doing now?

Probably Facebooking. Hahaha. :D

Was tagged by Trish. :)

Ciao.