Money Talk, So Divine

I've been wondering for a long time. I'm sixteen now. I am officially legal to go work and earn some of my own money. And I'm willing to do so too, but the thing is, I don't know if I'll be able to cope. No, no, no. I KNOW I'll be able to cope working even if I would have to stand all day long. I'm pretty good at standing all day long. Haha. Yea, cos I usually go to concerts about six hours earlier than the time they start, just so I get the best spots. Haha. So yea. But then, I'm wondering, should I?

I know they always say that at this age, if your family is not in the need, it's probably best that you, you know, just stay at home and do what a student's supposed to do. Enjoy AND study. Not work. Leave that till when you've officially graduated from your school years. But the thing is, I would really really love to be able to earn my own money. I mean it's MONEY. Which equals MY LIFE. I would do ANYTHING for money. I would really like to try to go working. But I wonder if my parents will allow? I know I sound like some spoilt brat, but hey, I'm not. YOU know I'm not. It's just. Well, my mum will definitely say I'm being lerbeh and my dad though he does not live with me and thus have very minimal power over my life, will also tell me that I should not work and stop being lerbeh for once in my life. Heck, he will even promise to pay whatever the shit amount of money it is I would be earning if I were to work and tell me that if I needed money that bad, I should just go ask him. From him.

And I'm like, "Yea, dad, I'll ask you." If you were one of those gullible dads who'd pay your daughter money anytime she wants, I would. Unfortunately, you're not. So, dad, no, I think I should really work if I wanna hold control over my money...

Cos you see, I realised I was so obsessive over money ever since this one incident. It is something that I will NEVER be able to forget. NEVER.

Okay, so, my obsession over money first started when I earned my FIRST RM2000 from various parties after I achieved good results for my PMR. I was really stoked because for the first time in my life, I really felt that my efforts were paid off. My PMR results restored my pride and also my empty pocket. Haha. And so my mum, being the nice woman she likes to pretend to be, kindly asked if I needed her help to keep those money cos RM2000 was alot. And she had an unused bank account of which she was willing to let me use. So I believed her. I passed all my money to her and trusted her to keep them safe and in the bank. ONLY to find out that she not only did not keep my money in the bank, she had USED it WITHOUT my permission!!! All RM2000!! I swear, I almost slapped her when I found out. Were it not for my admirable perseverance, she would have already had a scar on her face AND her memory as well.

Not only that, when I confronted her about it, she said I was being SELFISH that I got so angry over RM2000. She said that being my mother, she was allowed to use my money. I was like, "Erm, mum, it's RM2000!!! Which I have earned SINGLE-HANDEDLY!!! Which you have used WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!!! HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO ACCEPT THAT???" Only I didn't say it out loud, because I have strong perseverance. But nonetheless, I was really hurt after that incident. Oh well, at least it taught me a valuable lesson: Never trust anyone, not your friends, not your family members, NO ONE but YOURSELF. Especially if it involves MONEY. Then you will have a happy life.

And not to mention she hasn't even yet returned me my money. Even till now. So I'm telling you, until she pays back all my money, I will never lose my guard. Heck, even AFTER she returns me my money, I will still not lose my guard. I will never again trust her with my money, or anyone for that matter. My money is my life. I take control of my life.

So, I was saying. I want to work. Ash, Yeng and Mish are working already. I really think it'd be a good opportunity to expose me to the outside world cos God knows how socially-retarded I am. And the most important part of this is I will finally get to earn my own money and keep it safely in my own personal bank account. That sounds so divine. And divine suits me. Even if I don't believe in the existence of God. (Strictly no offence to anyone.) :D

Talking about bank accounts, I got my own in the middle of this year and unlike my sister, I kept my pin number secret to myself. Only I know about it. Smart ey? :D I actually pity my sister, because of all people, she let my mum know of her pin number. God knows what will happen when my mum gets desperate for money. My sister will seriously regret this later, I tell you.

Okay, last words: I don't mean to tarnish my mum's reputation here. Even though all I'm saying is true. I just hope that one day I will happily be able to delete this post like it's some trash that isn't true at all. Sadly, the chances of my mum ever changing are close to nil.

So, let's not keep my hopes high.

Ciao.