HOW TO GET OVER YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND

I am going to come right out and say it.

During my last break-up, it was HELL. I felt so much like a loser, my self-esteem plunged and I always wondered if I could ever like anyone again.

Dramatic, naive, stupid, bla bla bla I know. But it’s normal right? Tell me one person who had just been dumped by her boyfriend but didn’t feel that way?

That’s correct. NONE. Unless she had stopped loving him from the start, didn’t really love him anyway etc etc

ANYWAY.

What I want to blog about today is despite the fact that it was my worst break-up so far, I am completely healed! And the process of my healing was also the BEST so far I’ve had!

So as the kind and thoughtful girl that I am, today I want to share with you guys :

HOW TO GET OVER YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND

1) Mourn and cry

The first week of the break-up, you are bound to feel like you want to die, that you wish that everything never happened the way it did, but GUESS WHAT. It has HAPPENED. Nothing’s gonna change that. So just mourn! And cry! Cry as much as you want! Get everything out of your system once and for all!

Don’t ever restrain from crying when you feel like it because that just makes everything even harder later on. You won’t be able to let go of him so easily if you stopped yourself from being sad over him.

Just be yourself, let your mind be upset, let your mind feel like dying and let your mind go through the effects of the break-up thoroughly. This has to happen in order for you to feel satisfied.

But NEVER ever resort to killing yourself. Because then you’re spoiling the game and your healing won’t work.

Because then you will never heal. For the rest of your memory (not life, because duh, you’re dead) you will be remembered as someone who killed yourself for a douchebag who dumped you.

So play wise! You want to win this game! You want to be healed!

Because mourning and crying sets a reminder to yourself for the rest of your life. (more on that later)

2) Find someone else

After your first week (or first few weeks) of living like the dead, it is time to start afresh! Don’t worry if it’s only your first week and you still don’t feel like starting afresh anytime. IT WILL COME SOON. Take your time! But don’t purposefully drown yourself in sorrow! Everything will come naturally! Just fall within the pace and you will be fine!

As I was saying, START AFRESH! Flirt with guys, look out for hotties, make yourself beautiful to restore your self-esteem.

Find someone who is worthy of your time and spend alot of time with him. BUT! Do not make this forceful, make sure you yourself are game to participate, or not you will just end up feeling like a user. YOU DON’T WANT THAT.

You want to be a GOOD COMPANION instead! Don’t worry that you won’t be able to have fun at all after your break up, because YOU WILL!

You just need to find the right type of guy.

Make him appreciate you! If he doesn’t, find someone else who does! Don’t worry, you WILL find someone! Just make sure you appreciate yourself first and nothing would be a problem!

If it works out between you and the guy, take him! (love is a gamble anyway but you should ALWAYS know where your stakes stand)

If it doesn’t, remain close friends, if he is worth it, he will stay, if he is not, soon enough he will disappear from your life. And nobody loses anything because everything is mutual.

Plus point : If it works out between you and the guy, you get a new boyfriend who appreciates you more! Or if it doesn’t work out, at least he helped you restore your self-esteem!

3) Keep the things he ever gave you

Contrary to popular belief, you should NOT throw away the things that your ex-boyfriend ever gave you. Especially those that you liked. Keep them! Store them!

Because they are YOURS! They show how much you are worth even to a guy who dumped you and they also serve as a reminder to yourself about the jerk you used to date but no longer pine for!

Those things will of course be painful to look at during the process of your healing, but don’t worry, at the end of everything, they will serve as good objects to help you maintain your healed condition.

Keep them where they are to remind you of the jerk who you once dated so that you will never fall for those guys again.

Same as the mourning and crying thing, they serve to remind you of how stupid you have once been for crying so much over a jerk like that. So much wasted time and tears.

And then you will become stronger as you realise you are worth much more than how the guy treated you before!

4) However, delete him from Facebook

Facebook is like a warzone. You get to see all sorts of things done by all sorts of people.

You can see the way they live their lives, whether or not they are happy, or sad, or fucked up.

THIS IS VITAL! Because you do NOT want to see your ex all happy and glad that he has broken up with you. You want to WIN the game. You want to live like he is REGRETFUL that he ever let you go. Whether it’s true or not, it doesn’t matter. As long as you don’t expose yourself to the truth, you can pretty much create your OWN truth.

If you are happy, then allow your profile to be seen by the public. Because you know what? HE WILL COME AND CHECK OUT YOUR PROFILE.

Show him how happy you are. Rub it in his face that his departure meant so little to you. Make sure he KNOWS that he is the regretful one.

But if you are very upset, then keep your profile private. Don’t let him know that you are suffering. Keep him in the dark. That will torture him.

However, make sure you don’t go to his profile to check out about him even after you have deleted him. But that would be really hard because we ourselves want to know if the break up affected HIM! Believe me, I did that SO many times I cried everytime I did that.

So if worse comes to worst and you can’t stop yourself from visiting his profile even after you deleted him, BLOCK him from Facebook altogether.

This prevents you from ever being able to stalk him again. And everything will become easier because you don’t know the truth.

But don’t forget the same theory, if you are happy, public-able your profile. If you are sad, make your profile private.

Because he WILL, WITHOUT FAIL, try stalking you from other people’s profile. He won’t be able to stop himself. Guys have this natural need of dominance to know that they have a huge effect on girls. So he will definitely try to find out.

That said, there is no need to delete his friends from your Facebook, because you need to allow him a subtle way to continue to feel like the loser who stalks his ex-girlfriend.

5) Admit out loud that he was a jerk

It may seem hard to call someone you used to love so much a jerk but just do it!

If you have no intentions of ever being together with him again, don’t worry about the insults! PILE THEM UP.

If a guy can hurt you that way, convince yourself that he is not worth a second chance. This is where the mourning and crying come in handy.

If you ever get back together with the jerk who dumped you, you are opening yourself to the possibility that you WILL go through the same shit (maybe even worse) again when he dumps you. All the mourning and crying and feeling like dying. Is it worth it?

If he can hurt you once, he can hurt you twice. Don’t give him a chance! There are many more guys out there who is worthy of you.

I believe that someone who loves you will try all he can to maintain a relationship with you. There is just no excuse for a break up except that he doesn’t really love you.

Need to study, family objection, no money etc ALL BULLSHIT. If the guy wants you, he will brave through EVERYTHING to be with you.

Once you admit to yourself that you have wasted your time with him, it will gradually become easier to let him go.

After all, who needs a jerk in their life?

***

If you manage to accomplish all that, CONGRATULATIONS, you are HEALED!

And what’s even better is you will never let a guy hurt you like that again because you know better now.

To me, if a guy can hurt you so much and for so long, then he is not worth a second chance at all. Don’t let yourself down. Hold your head up and believe in yourself. Don’t ever sell yourself short!

Someday, somewhere, someone who truly loves you will appear. Meanwhile, have all the fun you can!

One easy way to convince yourself that you should not be treated badly is reminding yourself about your mum.

Your mum loves you the way you are and you know she always will. Would she be happy if her own precious daughter allows herself to be treated badly by another guy? You have self-worth because your mum has self-worth. She gave birth to you and shared you with the world. She wants the whole world to love you like she does. She did not give birth to you so that you can be hurt.

Appreciate those little facts. We all have self-worth. Those who abuse us have no right to hurt us in anyway.

So buck up and make sure nobody ever hurts you again!

Hope this helped you/you enjoyed! BYE BYE!

P/S : I FORGOT TO MENTION! After all those steps and you have finally healed, your ex-boyfriend will DEFINITELY, WITHOUT FAIL text you one day out of the blue! He will pretend that he is being friendly, when in actual fact, he wants to know how you are doing! He wants to find out if you are still affected! Don’t fall for his cheap lies and ways!

DO NOT ignore his friendly messages because if you do, it means that you are still affected by him that you kenot even manage to have any contact with him. The correct way is to text him indifferently. Make him feel like he is nothing to you. This will make him go crazy!

Soon enough, after more of these indifferent messages, he will suddenly become ANGRY! And VIOLENT! Because he kenot take it that you have completely got over him! So there, that shows you what kind of a jerk he is capable of being. You will feel GRATEFUL that you didn’t give in to his pretentious ways.

And then you will live happily ever after knowing that you will/can never be hurt again.

P/S 2 : So that means DON’T delete his number from your phone! Because you want to be able to know when he texts/calls you. AH! Talking about calls, NEVER ANSWER! Because we can fake indifference through text but it’s abit trickier through calls. So just ignore his calls EVERYTIME and text him back after that, making an excuse about how you were busy etc etc

P/S 3 : And NEVER agree to go out with him again. Even with friends, or alone, whatever. NEVER. Because then it would be even HARDER to fake indifference. And you are letting him win by allowing him to find out how you are currently doing.

P/S 4 : Except of course if you guys have been friends a long time before you got together and the friendship can still remain normal even after break up and if you have many CLOSE mutual friends, then most of the tips I gave won’t work. LOL But other than that my tips are FAB.