Why?

Life is very confusing. Or rather, the people who live in it are confusing. I bet most of us don't even understand half the things we do. Or even what we think about. Or how our emotions work.
I feel like I'm not intact enough with my emotions and feelings. Because half the time, I cannot figure out why I feel this way, or why I feel that way. It's strange. And sometimes it scares me. I have a very weird and wild imagination, and I think too much. It is difficult for me to shut my mind off, because I'm always worrying.
I'm very paranoid about alot of things, I realise.
When someone doesn't return my call, instead of thinking up logic explanations, like maybe that person's phone is out of credit, or maybe he/she is busy with work, or he/she didn't happen to hear the phone ring, I usually assume that that person has got into an accident, or he/she dropped his/her phone and worse, I always get really uneasy when I think of the possibility that he/she is trying to avoid me.
I am so pathetic.
Even simple messages, that don't necessarily involve me, can affect my mood and make me feel uneasy the whole day. Even messages that don't carry specific meaning or whatever, in my mind, they always turn out to be spiky remarks meant for me.
But of course, those messages have to be written by people whom I really care about, and also the unreturned calls will have to be from people I actually give a damn about.
But still. It's scary. It's scary when you don't have the answer to something. It's scary when you cannot figure why a certain person acts this way. It's scary when you cannot decipher your own feelings.
It's especially scary when someone you really care about tells you something, but you cannot determine whether or not it's the truth. Even if you try really really hard.
Ciao.